We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize