She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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