hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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