WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I have fence marks all over my body
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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