Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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