Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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