My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
