Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
