dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
