you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize
