Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
