ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
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