I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
