I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Randomize
