I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
im calling her cock vulture from now on
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
