About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
