So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
there is puke in my bra ... again
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
