I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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