Im at strip club and am horny
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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