It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
