What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Floor bacon is actually really good
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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