She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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