I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
