im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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