I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
