He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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