You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
lol hangovers are for mortals.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize