I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
