New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
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