is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
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