I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Randomize
