i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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