Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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