i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
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