I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
