When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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