to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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