At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
