It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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