We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
