1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
