He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
