after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
