Moan for me like Helen Keller
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
