you guys were way drunker than both of me
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
