So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
