you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
