the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I just blew my weed a kiss
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Randomize