Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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