She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
